Direction

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Direction

Post by steve on Sun Feb 15, 2009 1:21 pm

When I first joined this forum, I was pleasantly surprised at the level of intelligence displayed during the discussion of topics relevant to the River Valley. And while not everyone shared the same opinion on every topic (a very good thing), everyone seemed to be civil in presenting his/her point of view. On those rare occasions when a member became "a little too enthusiastic" in his/her position, the members called him/her out on it. In many cases, my own opinions differed from the majority here, but I was always treated with respect and allowed to continue expressing my opposing viewpoints. Recently, I have been feeling that the forum has degenerated from a place of open discussion of matters that affect all River Valley residents (past, present and future), to one that inordinately focuses on the administrator of a competing website. Now, I'll admit that she appears to go too far in some of her words and deeds, and her politics are diametrically opposed to those of the majority on this forum. Obviously, there will be some discussion here of her antics, but lately it seems that the preponderance of posts are attacks on her character. While I can't say that I disagree with all of these posts, I find it disturbing that she has become the "whipping boy" for those seeking to lay blame for all of the wrongs of the Valley. Is it because she is perceived to be an "easy target"? When she was posting to this forum, the members here had the opportunity to debate with her directly. Supposedly, she was banned from here for attempting to expose the identity of one or more anonymous posters. I agree that her action was in violation of this forum's rules, and SOMETHING had to be done. The problem now is that there is no two-way discussion here of her positions and actions, and the tit-for-tat banning from the opposing forums only serves to further divide the parties and strengthen the biases. As some of you may have noticed, I have not posted here recently. It is because I have been discouraged at the direction the discussions have taken here. If I wanted to read comments based more upon emotion and vindictiveness than intelligence and logical debate, I would read the blogs on the LSJ or the PPH. I guess I expect a higher level of civility here. Sadly, it seems that the civility has "left the building". I will continue for some time to monitor the discussions here, but I will not participate in character assassination - regardless of the subject. For those of you who do, I would hope that you find some other means to express your dissatisfaction with others' words and deeds instead of the self-perpetuating denigration of someone who cannot respond here.

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Re: Direction

Post by 911Dispatcher on Sun Feb 15, 2009 1:26 pm

This is a section from the very first post on this website:

What I disagree with you about is what I perceive as the root
of much of the problem in this town. I believe much of the problem
started at TRR web site. That site attacks anyone that they disagree
with and they write often with anonymity. I wonít get into everything
here because weíve all seen it. I believe that site is what this
editorial in the Sun Journal was referring to. When you publicly state
some of the things they have stated, itís a normal human response for
people to become angry.

I know that to bring this up here
invites a continuation of some of the discord in our town. The
alternative is to continue to live with such negative behavior. I
believe itís our civic duty to try to make our town better and
challenge those things that are hurtful to our town.

If you are
thinking of writing something that personally attacks those that run
that web site, donít bother. It wonít stay on here long. If you want to
talk about what has gone wrong in our town and what you believe will
make it better, weíd love to hear from you.


Thank you Steve....its time to get back to our roots!
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Re: Direction

Post by Timeout on Sun Feb 15, 2009 1:31 pm

I have to agree. Too much about TRR. We may not all agree on this...I still love ya all!
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Re: Direction

Post by T on Sun Feb 15, 2009 1:54 pm

Those who pontificate need to check that their own house is in order.

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Re: Direction

Post by 911Dispatcher on Sun Feb 15, 2009 2:13 pm

T I like what you said. Much like don't throw stones when you live in a glass house. However my naughty side is coming out a bit. I enjoy being told that I'm out of line and have someone put me back on the right track, basically in simple terms getting spanked. So I thank both you and Steve for that.
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Re: Direction

Post by Timeout on Sun Feb 15, 2009 2:23 pm

Exactly T, and that's why I think it's enough...I have plenty of my own stuff to work on.
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Re: Direction

Post by Vigs on Sun Feb 15, 2009 2:33 pm

Words are words, stones hurt. Everybody has something to say so let the words be heard or let them go. You make your own way....... If you dont like what is said don't read them look away.
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Re: Direction

Post by C on Sun Feb 15, 2009 3:04 pm

That is why we try to limit the TRR comments to the Accountability forum- perhaps that should be renamed? We are striving to keep the main forum for the debate of issues. Separating the two allows those who don't want to read the TRR stuff to simply not go there.
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Re: Direction

Post by Vigs on Sun Feb 15, 2009 3:37 pm

Dont look back, Look away. Bad things seem to bother you if you look.....
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Re: Direction

Post by Timeout on Sun Feb 15, 2009 4:37 pm

"Forgiveness is a creative act
That changes us
From prisoners of the past
To liberated people
At peace with our own memories."

Author unknown

Nice thought, huh? But how does a person forgive? Especially when we believe we are wronged? I have one answer for that and you probably know what it is. Of myself alone, I am not capable, so I pray for it. Sometimes it takes a LONG time to get there. Once I get there, I want to pass it on to everyone...it is a peaceful place to be. Every single person on this forum has helped me to get there and I thank you for it. I finally sat down recently and wrote a lot of this out, trying to see where I was stuck...then I asked myself what I can do to change it. That helped too.

We have done a lot of good work together to stand up to some of the untruths that bother this community. I'm proud of everyone on here. Each person has helped in their own way. None of us is perfect...well, at least I know I'm not, but that doesn't keep me from striving for at least some sort of grace, even when I fall down in the attempt. This is a good group of people.
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Re: Direction

Post by Admin on Tue Feb 17, 2009 1:13 am

Hi Steve,

Thanks for your letter and your feedback. You make a couple of really good points.

When we started the forum we were really hopeful that people could stick with issues and not focus on people. Unfortunately, at times the behavior of certain town officials is the issue that needs to be discussed.

The problem here is, JSN behaves in a way that needs to be responded to at times.
She holds a position of power on the Finance Committee and the Medcare board. While being in those positions, she has launched personal attacks against town employees and put forth misinformation. This behavior should be challenged. No one that is in a leadership position should behave this way.

It strikes me as rather unbelievable that our Selectmen continue to appoint her to positions of power in this town. They should be removing her from positions of power. Any other member that behaved as she has would have been removed long ago. The fact that she continues to behave this way and maintain positions of power smacks of whatís wrong with this town.

We will continue to take JSN to task when necessary. She canít respond here but she can, and does respond on her own website.

You are right though Steve. There has been an inordinate amount of energy focused her way and I have winced when I have read some of the post. Iíve asked our members before to not post simply for the purpose of trying to be hurtful to others. We have been upset with TRR for behaving in a vindictive and spiteful way. The worst thing we can do is to behave in the same way.

I am once again asking our membership to think about what they are trying to accomplish with their post before they hit the send button. If itís simply to be hurtful, donít post it here.

Thank you again Steve, for your comments. They have been quite helpful. Iím hopeful that many of us find them equally helpful.
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Re: Direction

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